Mossflower: Beyond the Fourth Wall
by DeadfangtheWanderer
Summary: In the midst of the Redwall universe, the fourth wall is at risk of destruction by Waffle Gigantes and the cyborg rat Cluny Omega. Holly Ottermaid, a gardener at Redwall, is called by Martin to defeat Gigantes and save the universes. With help from the mousewarrior Dandruff, the hare General Cupcake, and the mysterious Deadfang, can Holly save the fourth wall before it's too late?
1. Prelude

The room is pitch black.

Suddenly, a bright overhead light comes on, revealing a small vole standing in the center of the dark room. He wears a navy blue suit, with a black tie and circular glasses. He looks up.

"As I'm sure you all know, this is a fanfic. It may be a good one, it may be a bad one. DeadfangtheWanderer/Wings Artifex and/or Silvereye Productions is not responsible for any and all mishaps that happen whilst reading this fanfic. HALLELUJAH PRAISE THE LO-"

**Keep it together, Grahamcrapper.**

"Terribly sorry, M'lady. On behalf on M'lady Wingsia Madelina Artifex, I proudly present to you: Mossflower: Beyond the Fourth Wall. This is Frank Grahamcrapper, signing off."

**Thank you.  
**


	2. Book 1: The Ottermaid, Chapter 1

_Here at Redwall!_

_Orchards gardens fresh, what a wonder, just the best!_  
_There's dibbuns dancing in the sun, spring is here, it's time for fun!_

_Here at Redwall!_

_No more games inside, frolic now, go run and hide!_  
_Feast laid out in Cavern Hole, don't like the food? Suck vermin balls!_

_Here at Redwall..._

_Spring is here, my plants will grow, seeds to buy and fields to sow and I'll carry on my wayward life, maybe this spring it'll be love that I find..._

"Holly! Hey, Holly!"  
"Yes, Dandruff the Warrior?"  
"Guess what? Abbot Destroydark wants to promote you to official Redwall gardener!"  
"Wait, seriously? Have my only dreams come true? Does my life finally have a purpose?"  
"No."  
"What was the point of you telling me that, then?"  
"I can't sing and wanted to take part in the musical. "  
"Oh. "

_Here at Redwall!_

_Celebrate, sisters and brothers, spring; a season like no other_  
_Dance around while food is basted, later this night, let's all get wasted!_

_Here at Redwall!_  
_Here at Redwall!_

_Slavering o'er hot pans and pots all day, starting to waste my life away,_  
_The salad's wrong, the pie's amiss,_  
_Am I even getting paid for this?_

_Here at Redwall!_  
_Here at Redwall!_

_I'm the Skipper, ain't it great? Dear Hot root soup, I just can't wait!_  
_And in the river we'll all dive,_  
_Before our carnivorous Abbot eats us all alive!_

_Here at Redwall!_  
_Here at Redwall!_  
_Here at Redwall!_

_Spring is here!_

_Here at Redwall!_  
_Here at Redwall!_  
_Here at Redwall!_

_Here at Redwall..._

_We welcome spring this year...!_

* * *

Holly was just an average ottermaid.

She was the apprentice gardener, studying under the eccentric squirrel Brother Doppen. Technically, she wasn't actually his apprentice, she just did what he did and hoped that he would notice. But the brother, being the strange old squirrel that he was, would simply pretend that Holly wasn't there. The few times he did notice her were often followed by him remarking about how 'ladies like her belonged in the kitchen' and how 'they needed to start putting constraints on what women were allowed in the Abbey.' Understandably, a lot of the other Redwallers stayed away from him.

But Holly wasn't to be deterred. She wanted to be the Abbey gardener, and nothing would stop her from achieving her goal.

* * *

It was the beginning of spring.

And, per usual, Redwall was alive with festivities. Games were being played, food was being served, and all the abbeybeast were in general good cheer. All except for a few.

Inside the quiet peacefulness of Cavern Hole, a small congregation of Redwallers sat, each with a look of anxiousness plastered upon their face. The small group was made up of five creatures; Toppen the squirrel, the abbey recorder; Cellarhog Renfus; Foremole Shenzfri; Abbot Destroydark, a wolverine; and Sturdden, the dormouse friar. Their anxious silence was interrupted by a pounding on the end of the table.

"All right, Abbeydwellers! Time for srs bzns! Our secret is starting to become unraveled, what do we do about it?" Toppen shouted across the table, continuing to pound his furry fist on the end of the wooden tabletop. Cellarhog Refus gave a heavy sigh.

"Aye, I don't know what we're gunna do. Maybe we should just tell them...?"

"No, it'll scare the poor creatures to death." Sturrden said, "And they probably wouldn't understand anyways. So until we're able to prove what is happening, I guess we're screwed."

"Hmm...you have a point, dear Sturrden, but what if it really all goes downhill? What would happen then?" Toppen asked. "What do you think, father?"

Destroydark smiled, his yellowed and bloodstained teeth shining like a beacon in the midmorning light. He made a strange growling noise.

"_What?_ No, Destroydark, I thought we went over this! The solution isn't always murder...you're an abbot, remember? Abbots promote peace and kindness, not bloodshed and Satanism."

Destroydark grunted sadly and stared down at the floor.

Toppen gave an exhausted sigh. "Well, it's been concluded. The best thing for us to do is to just sit and wait. And when crisis happens, we'll be there to tell them what's going on. Does everybeast agree?"

A reluctant 'aye' arose from the small crowd.

"Very well. Meeting ended. "

* * *

It was a dark day in the outer plane of the Fanon Universe.

A dark day for Waffle Gigantes, at least.

The giant skunk paced around his throne room in annoyance, his crimson satin cape flowing behind him. There was complications in the building of the next commander of his army. Literally, the building. Because you can't resurrect a dead rat warlord into a all-powerful demon cyborg without a little construction, correct?

Waffle convinced himself to calm down a little. Because even if things didn't work out all as planned, he still had a strategy. And in his eyes, a good strategy was enough to get you to the Canonical Plane, at least. Or at least he sure hoped so.

But Waffle Gigantes, being the typical stereotypical vermin, was unwavering in his confidence. Out there sat his empire, his homeland. What was his plan, you may ask? His overall plan was simple.

Take control of all the Fanon Infinite Universes, one at a time, starting with Redwall. And from there, all breaches of the Canonical Plane would have been intertwined with Fanon. That was the only hard part. After that, the Real World would slowly fall into his paws.

Because once he captured and took control of both Canon and Fanon, there would be only one barrier between the power-hungry skunk and total domination: The Fourth Wall.


	3. Chapter 2

Overall, Holly was having a pretty good day. She had finished her work in the garden, had a good lunch, and now was free to lounge in Cavern Hole. The studious ottermaid relaxed on the windowsill, sighed with contentment, and flipped open a book.

Her peace was interrupted by Toppen barging into the room with a concerned look on his face.

"Is something wrong, Toppen?" Holly asked. The squirrel turned his head in alarm, his eyes wide.

"Hm? Oh, nothing's wrong, my dear Holly. Just recorder business, you know. " he said as a bead of sweat trickled down from his ears.

"Right..." Holly replied.

"Though, I do have a question for you, Holly. " he said.

From her perch on the windowsill, Holly sniffed. "What is it, Toppen?"

Toppen rubbed the back of his neck. "I was wondering if...if you noticed anything strange going on recently."

"Our abbott wants to eat us all, Little Nutmuffin tried to skin the other dibbuns with a peeling knife again, Holly's Own products are now selling under my name without my permission, they're rebuilding St. Ninians as a strip club, they found the body of a weasel under one of the cots in the dormitories, the current badger lord is a raging tranny, and I have a slight pain in my left leg." She said matter-of-factly.

Toppen gave a slightly relieved sigh. "Okay, nothing out of the ordinary. Good."

"Oh, and also, Martin keeps appearing to me in dreams."

"Wait, what?" Toppen asked incredulously.

"You know, Martin?"

"Yeah, yeah...but what did he tell you?"

Holly scratched the back of her head, her eyes narrowing. "I'm actually not even sure...it's like he's trying to tell me something, but can't get it across. I'm really just not even sure. Whenever he appears, he usually just points to random places around me and says things that I can't hear. It's kind of trippy, actually."

Toppen huffed impatiently. "So no secret messages and whatnot? Not even a riddle?"

"I don't think so..." Holly said.

"Hmph. Very well then." Toppen replied, shuffling out the dormitory. Holly watched him as he walked out, confused.

"I swear this place gets crazier and crazier every day." she said to nobeast in particular.

* * *

Cupcake was quite the stiff hare.

"Hey Mister General or whatevs, Nightflash wants to see you."

"That's ex-captain of the Long Patrol to you, sah." Cupcake said to the other, smaller hare that stood in front of him.

"Oh, yeah, that."

Cupcake sniffed indignantly, walking away from the young and clearly inferior hare that had just been speaking to him. Young ones had no business addressing him in such a manner.

Upon walking up from the coast, into Salamandastron, and through the corridors to the Badger Lord's keep, Cupcake could hear the sound that made him cringe almost every time he went into Lord Nightflash's room. The sound of Nightflash doing what he did in his spare time.

_"Don't get strung out by the way that I look,_  
_Don't judge a book by its cover_  
_I'm not much of a man by the light of day, _  
_But by night I'm one hell of a lover,_

_I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania...!_

_So let me show you around, maybe play you a sound_  
_You look like you're both pretty groovy_  
_Or if you want something visual that's not too abysmal_  
_We could take in an old Steve Reeves movie._

_...So you got caught with a flat, well, how about that?_  
_Well babies, don't you panic._  
_By the light of the night when it all seems alright_  
_I'll get you a satanic mechanic._

_I'm just a Sweet Transvestite from Transexual, Transylvania...!"_

The words seemed to bounce around in Cupcakes ears as he knocked on the wooden door. Inside, he could hear the music stop, followed by the painful sounding _click click _of five inch high heels as his Lord/Lady approached the door.

"Who is it?" the voice behind the door asked. Cupcake sighed.

"It's Cupcake...Mistress."

"Oh, well welcome in, then." Nightflash said, opening the door.

Cupcake was immediately greeted by quite a gaudy sight; the Badger Lord's chamber all strewn with ribbons on pink and white. Part of the room had been turned into a fashion show-type setup, with a short catwalk jutting out through the wall on one side of the room. A somewhat large cabinet had been pulled out next to the catwalk; filled with high heeled platform shoes and ridiculous poofy-pink outfits. Make-up seemed to have been spread all throughout the chamber, mostly tubes of crimson red lipstick. At the very front of all this was a bright sign that hung from the ceiling, lined with white fluorescents. On it, scribbled in girly pink cursive, was written:

_**Badgerista S. Fashionista: The jewel of all mountain lords!**_

Cupcake had always loathed that sign.

"Well, how's it goin'?" Nightflash, AKA Badgerista, asked.

Cupcake looked up at his lord, frilly pink one-piece and all, and gave a slight bow. "You requested my presence, I believe?"

Nightflash snorted. "Ah, yes. Come along, darling. But give me a second to remove my makeup."

Cupcake nodded, watching the Badger Lord as he strutted over to a mirror on the opposite side of the room. Cupcake turned his head, distracted by a small sound to his side. When he turned back, Lord Nightflash stood directly in front of him, any trace of his former effeminate-ness erased. He was now Nightflash the Adequate, lord of Salamamdastron.

"Come in." Nightflash said.

Cupcake stepped in timidly, seeing that all of the pink fabulous-ness had been removed and the runway hidden. He took a seat on a nearby chair, looking up at his lord expectantly.

Nightflash began to shine his steel, poison spiked club, giving a long sigh.

"Lord...?" Cupcake said.

Nightflash looked back at Cupcake, his face grim. "We just got a message from Redwall, General."

"And...?"

"The secret. It's about to be unleashed."


	4. Chapter 3

"Secret, sah? Which one?" Cupcake asked with alarm.

Nightflash sighed heavily. "You know, /the/ secret. About the fourth wall and everything? How it might crumble at any second?"

Cupcake said nothing, only leaned back and stroked his mustache.

"No reaction whatsoever...?" Nightflash said incredulously. "C'mon, Cupcake, you're supposed to be the smart one. What are we supposed to do?"

Cupcake sniffed indignantly. "Well, since I'm the smart one, I suggest you sit down and think this over with me, If ya don't mind, wot."

"Yeah, but..." Nightflash began, but then paused and took a deep breath. "Right as usual, Cupcake. We need to take this in steps. First of all, who's the evil one?"

"The evil one...?"

"Yeah, you know, the evil one. Who's the antagonist of the story?" Nightflash said.

Suddenly, Nightflash appeared dazed, staring towards something that Cupcake couldn't see, like an invisible wall of some sort. "It's already starting."

"How so, sah?" Cupcake asked. Nightflash never reacted this way; it was how Cupcake knew serious shit was about to go down.

"Second step: we need Martin, he's the only one who can tell us what to do." Nighflash said quickly. "Do you know how to summon Martin?"

"I apologize sah, but as a badger lord, shouldn't you be consulting the ancestors?"

"Probably. But Martin is the one who usually does everything anyways."

"Uh..."

"WAIT! I have an idea."

"Sah?"

"Cupcake, I..." Nighflash said slowly, his face seeming to freeze.

"S-sah?" Cupcake asked, worried.

Then Cupcake heard the music start up. Slow and dreary, like a sort of lullaby. He didn't know where the music was coming from, but as Nighflash looked down dramatically and the lights dimmed, he knew what it meant:

A musical number.

_"Cupcake, my sir, oh general dear,  
Do you know what would happen  
If the fourth wall disappeared..._

_Storms pile, here's chaos, filled up with fear,_  
_Our protection almost faded_  
_The creators are here…_

…

_And nobeast may believe,  
This secret we keep,  
But this tragedy we face  
This whole world shall soon see;_

_And in time it shall creep up quietly..._

_Swiftly but still oh so quietly..._

_Quieeeeeetllllllyyy..."_

Cupcake blinked as all the lights in the room went out. With a deep breath, he sat up slightly. Hopefully his Lord Nighflash had found the sense to talk instead of sing.

Cupcake bit back his thoughts as a loud brass line belted out suddenly. The lights shot on, as Nightflash posed dramatically, a line of female hare backup dancers behind him.

_"Oh seeee a hero approaches,__  
(Who is it? Who is that?)_  
_Martin? Martin? Where art thee?  
Send a hero, send them to me!  
(Send them to us! Send them to he!)_

_Oh Martin,  
Can't you seeeee our world's about to plummet to the ground?  
And based on the past I'd say  
You're the one who can bring a savior 'round!  
(Bring 'em round! Bring 'em round!)_

_Our dear fourth waaaallll is cracking,  
Please don't let it faaaalll I'm asking,  
So Martin send a hero now,  
Send a savior, bring 'em rouuuunnndd!"_

Cupcake flinched at the piercing high note.

"And why should you send a hero to save the fourth wall?! Why?!" Nighflash shouted suddenly, as the music stopped, before starting up again. "Because..."

_"This world don't need no sparkly vampires!_  
_Pretty pink ponies,__ dragons and fire!_  
_No clan cats, bird kids, killer notebooks,_  
_No demigods, Irkens, demon butlers!_

_We don't got room for a flying police box!  
Human countries, British detectives!  
No Dovahkiin, gay wizards, Homestuck trolls,  
No tubby fourth-grade Hitlers or Paper Jam Dippers, yo!"  
_

_So Martin can't you seeee our trouble?  
So send me a hero now, today!  
Because if you don't, nothing will be okay!"_

Cupcake casually reached behind his chair and pulled the cord connected to the outlet. He was rewarded with a satisfying confused silence as the lights went back to normal and the speakers cut off.

"What in Hellgates? That's the third time this week! How does that keep happening?" Nighflash said incredulously, looking behind Cupcake, who was whistling casually.

"I have no idea how that happened sah. Must be an issue with the power, wot. Maybe you accidentally pulled on the cord in the midst of your campy wailing? I mean singing?"

Nighflash sighed, shooing off the dancers. "Yeah, you're probably right Cupcake, as usual."

* * *

_"Holly...Yo, Holly..."_

_"Is that you, Martin?"_

_"No, it's Gandalf. Of course it's Martin, you silly ottermaid."_

_"Er...okay? What have you been trying to tell me? Why are you only now able to talk to me? Why has everybeast been acting so weird?"_

_"Sweet Voldemort, give me a second. First of all, I brings news of things you will probably not understand. Ever heard of something called the Fourth Wall?"_

_"I think...I think I've read about it in a book once. Something about an invisible wall that separates us from the creators and also the rest of the universes?"_

_"You read about it? Dang, you Mary Sue protagonists sure are bookworms. But yeah, that's pretty much it. But my time talking to you is short, so I'll explain quick. The reason I've been having a hard time talking to you is because an evil skunk warlord named Waffle Gigantes is trying to destroy the fourth wall, along with his league of evil and such. The whole thing's sorta a big secret between the Redwall elders and Nightflash the Adequate of Salamandastron, which is why they've been so antsy. Anyways, the evil ones had put a barrier on me so it was hard to talk to you, but I finally broke through temporarily, with the encouragement of my dear stalker Nighflash. Basically, you have to save everybody, because it won't be long since they capture me. You have to defeat him and save the fourth wall." _

_"What? Why me? Why not someone like Dandruff?"_

_"Ah, Dandruff. That brings me to another point. Simply put, Dandruff is kind of a douche."_

_"Hey! He's not a...okay, yeah he is."_

_"Yes. However, since he is your friend and wields my sword, he will go with you. A few others shall also go with you, who you shall discover later"_

_"Okay...? How am I supposed to stop Waffle? Where do I go?"_

_"You will know where to go, Holly. I promise you. When you reach your destination, you shall know. You see, there is one obstacle between Gigantes and total destruction of the fourth wall, which is an object. If you can find this object before he does, and then destroy Gigantes, you shall be victorious. Leave in the morning, tell Toppen what's going on. You must help us, Holly Ottermaid, you're our only hope. Goodbye."  
_

_"Wait, Martin? Martin...?"_

* * *

Nutmuffin was a strange little dibbun.

None of the other dibbuns were too fond of little Nutmuffin, though understandably, as most sane beasts wouldn't take too kindly to someone randomly pinning them to a tree and stabbing them in the face with a plastic butterknife.

Nutmuffin was just that kind of dibbun.

It was quite late at night, at least for him. He sat milling on his little cot, which had been separated from the rest of the dibbuns after an accident the previous summer involving a pillow, a stick of insense, lard, and candy chestnuts. Nutmuffin was very smart for his age, and had no regrets.

However, his one regret was sticking around in this hellhole of an Abbey when he could be out murdering innocents. He just wanted to be a villain, dammit, and it was his only goal in life. In the Redwall universe, it was quite easy to live out whatever sadistic dreams you had, as long as you didn't get caught. But Nutmuffin was an exception, due to the fact that he was a squirrel, and a dibbun, and a Redwaller.

In his small mind, Nutmuffin mulled over what he had 'overheard' at the Elder's meeting earlier that day. He wanted to know the secret. And it didn't take a genius to figure out that it involved some evil force. Which gave Nutmuffin an idea.


End file.
